A lesson in the law | Segway Car | Jack + Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack

As usual, the whole car was a joke, but at least there was space to run around. Or, uh, wheel around. Jack couldn’t get the hang of this thing to save his life, but at least it couldn’t buck him off completely. And at least walking was car-approved once he got inside a store.

As far as the uniform, he wasn’t a huge fan of exposed hands and forearms, but there wasn’t anything wrong with them. Well, his hands a little, but hopefully they wouldn’t snag on much. And he’d loosened the tie, less out of any sense of stuffiness than the need to not have things chafing against the still very fresh wound around his neck. Even with the bandages on, it was overly sensitive. He’d already trimmed off the slightest modicum of hair to keep that from brushing up against it.

Good thing he’d had time in the last car, since his knives had been confiscated right at the start here. He’d managed to wheedle the one guy into getting his satchel back for the important medical supplies (which wasn’t actually a lie!), but he wasn’t allowed any more than that. Not even the extra food. But the food court was right across the way—it was fine. It was fine everything was fine he wasn’t out of food it was just slightly farther away it was fine.

Viper “Jack, Jack!”

A call startled him out of his unfocused staring, and he instantly let go of whatever new jacket candidate he’d been testing for durability before he’d gone off-track again. Did he need to run—Ah, Viper. She was… mad at him? Probably. Not at the moment, though, and that was good enough for him. Every motion was exhausting enough right now without him being more on-guard than necessary. If she managed to kill him before he could react properly, well too bad so sad. It was a little too hard to muster up any concern after going berserk with it for an extended period of time.

Viper “…Now that whole trial is done, I’m here ta take ya up on that lesson ya owed me.” The mischievous grin on her face grew more pronounced than usual, “What’cha say? Ready ta tango? Jus’ two officers’a the law?”

“Don’t remember offerin’ dance lessons.” It was clearly a figure of speech, sure, but he, uh. Genuinely didn’t remember what lessons he had offered. Safe to say it wasn’t dancing, though. And he did pretty distinctly remember her paying him for something, so. She’d be invested enough to remember on her end. Right?

Viper

Hopping from her segway, Viper was at Jack’s side with her usual zeal. Admittedly, the uniform was growing on her now she had adjusted it for her comfort. She had to admit, she did look good in the dress shirt and pants vibe, once she saw a glimpse of herself in the mirror. …Admittedly, it did show off some of her still-healing wounds, namely the bandaged stab wound, but hey. She looked sexy and bad-ss. She wouldn’t complain.

Literally any trace of prior anger was nowhere to be found, as she instead seemed very interested in getting said lessons from Jack.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Don’t remember offerin’ dance lessons.”

“Well, no duh!” Viper snorted, “Ya offered ta teach me how ta steal and be all sneaky. Like, bein’ much better at it an’ sh-t.” If Viper were a dog her tail would be wagging like crazy right now, she was so excited about spending so much quality time with Jack, and getting the lessons she had totally paid for. “Feels like it’d be kinda useful for this car, eh? Sneakin’ up on those robbers an’ gettin’ em.”

Roadie 🪶Jack

Her enthusiasm was amusing, if not contagious. Jack didn’t have the energy right now to bother getting all excited. Not that he would have, anyway. Reputation to maintain and all.

Viper “Ya offered ta teach me how ta steal and be all sneaky.

Wahaha, furtive mission accomplished. Time to nod along knowingly like he’d totally remembered that all along. Just testing her. As teaching-people did.

Viper “Feels like it’d be kinda useful for this car, eh? Sneakin’ up on those robbers an’ gettin’ em.”

“Ah, yeah, guess we’re s’posed to be doin’ that, huh? Woulda been too easy ’f they’d made us the robbers.”

He rubbed his hands together with a noticeable rasping sound and glanced about. Out here in civilization, so that got rid of a good few lessons… But it’d bring up others, too.

“Arright, lessee what I got to work with here. Not a lot to trip ya up—” except maybe the lining between the open aisles and the carpeted merchandise sections—“but just show me whatcha look like sneaking.”

Proper stance was everything, after all… Ahaha. He wasn’t thinking about that.

Viper

It’s okay, Jack, I’m sure she can practically feel how excited you are to have a true protégé to bestow your wisdoms upon. Her excitement certainly is contagious with how it bubbles and fizzes in every part of her bloodstream as she’s trying to at least somewhat contain herself. She’s *very* serious about this.

His comment on it being too easy if they were just assigned to robbers makes her nod almost enthusiastically,

“I know right? It’s, like, gotta be a challenge after all.” Viper snorts, but his little callback to her needing to not be tripped up made her groan. She almost wished he *had* forgotten about that. But she was here to learn, so she dropped into her sneaking stance obediently.

It was…. not the best? But not the worst ever, her body weight was definitely shifted too far forward, her feet too far apart and at awkward angles, but it was a good first proper attempt. Her arms were well positioned though, and had Jack been a gamer, he would definitely be able to tell where the majority of her skills had come from.

“I know my dexterity is good… it’s just… the posture.” Viper huffed, her sleight-of-hand was actually good, as were her reflexes but it was knowing those skills that tripped her up. Metaphorically of course.

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper Viper snorts, but his little callback to her needing to not be tripped up made her groan. She almost wished he had forgotten about that.

Yes, Jack definitely remembered that specific incident and wasn’t just thinking about sneak tactics in general. Mmm-hmm. No doubt. …Well, it was possible, at least. It had been funny.

Viper “I know my dexterity is good… it’s just… the posture.”

“No kidding. Least ya don’t got your arms flailing around to hit everythin’ you come across, but.”

He surveyed her from a distance for an extra moment (just to let the freshest wave of burn pain abate) before strolling towards her and circling around. Without warning, he shoved her hard—forward and to the right. The direction she was worst positioned to compensate for. Splat.

“Even the softest tread means nothin’ if ya lose your balance. We can start there.” He folded his arms and let out a breath. “Y’ever get any fightin’ lessons? Formal ’r not.” He sure hadn’t had a certified instructor, after all.

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack “No kidding. Least ya don’t got your arms flailing around to hit everythin’ you come across, but.”

“That’s where I’ve improved already!” Viper replied, entirely unpurtubed by his blunt assessment of her lack of skill in the terms of her ability to… well, sneak. She had been expecting him to start adjusting her legs and arms himself, but the shove from behind catches her entirely off guard. Falling forward, Viper splats to the ground unceremoniously.

However, she’s quickly back up on her feet and brushing herself off. She could take the embarrassment and the slight pain when she was going to learn from him.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Even the softest tread means nothin’ if ya lose your balance. We can start there.”

“Sounds like as good’a place as any!” Viper chirps, “But…nah. I ain’t had any fightin’ lessons. Wouldn’t complain ’bout some’a them either.” Perhaps she just wants to spar with him again, but hey… she did actually wanna train with him for reals.

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper “But…nah. I ain’t had any fightin’ lessons. Wouldn’t complain ’bout some’a them either.”

Yeah, figured. Still a little hard to believe. What, did she just not have parents? Eh. Not really his business.

“Well, we’ll wait an’ see if you can afford that, then.” Not like he’d look forward to it or anything. B-baka.

But for now, sneaking. Jack seemed a little less distractible than usual despite having to ration out how much he could turn his head.

“Right, well. Dunno where ya picked up that footing, then, but you got no reason to space your feet out so wide. Don’t want anything knockin’ ya over, sure, but your biggest risk’s you knocking you over. Want somethin’ you’re comfortable standin’ still in for a while, ’cause that’s ’xactly what it takes to do this right.”

Staying out of reach in case she tried to repay his earlier favor, he demonstrated his own stance for this situation. Not to copy exactly, since they wouldn’t have the same weight distribution, but hopefully it’d at least clear up whatever exaggerated ideas she’d gotten about this.

He scanned her over again.

“Ditch the pigeontoes, too. Won’t do ya any favors.”

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack What, did she just not have parents?

Ehhh. Yes and no, Jack! She had ’em but she sure as hell didn’t talk to ’em! …Nor did they teach her to fight. That’d just be…. weird, surely.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Well, we’ll wait an’ see if you can afford that, then.”

“I absolutely can, I’m sure! Once I get my wallet back, I’ve got like… 50 bucks. And I can always try an’ sort you out some more favours or whatever.” Jack was teaching her some important thieving skills, therefore she could always use those to pay for fighting lessons too, if he really wanted.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Right, well. Dunno where ya picked up that footing, then, but you got no reason to space your feet out so wide. Don’t want anything knockin’ ya over, sure, but your biggest risk’s you knocking you over. Want somethin’ you’re comfortable standin’ still in for a while, ’cause that’s ’xactly what it takes to do this right.”

“Eh… admittedly, from sh-t like games and movies, yanno. Stuff ya see on TV and think, like, ‘Oh! Yeah! I can like, totally do that!’.” She did, at least, seem like she didn’t have any plans to push him back in return, and instead let him fix her stance by mostly copying him. She adjusted her weight distribution to not… match him, but to be more comfortable standing. Obediently, she ditched the pigeon toes and stuck out her tongue as she focused.

“Is this better?” It was better, a lot better, actually!

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper …Nor did they teach her to fight. That’d just be…. weird, surely.

Haha, yeah. So weird.

Viper “I absolutely can, I’m sure! Once I get my wallet back, I’ve got like… 50 bucks. And I can always try an’ sort you out some more favours or whatever.”

“ ’m I s’posed to believe a fifty’ll getcha any decent lesson outside a’ here?”

“Maybe as a first-time discount. Just to see how hopeless ya are.” As if he’d already forgotten he’d fought her himself. Then again, he wasn’t likely to retain much detail from a fight he’d been more worried about fighting.

Viper Stuff ya see on TV and think, like, ‘Oh! Yeah! I can like, totally do that!’.”

He clearly didn’t watch much TV from the way he squinted. And also from being stuck on the train, probably, but even before then… Well. Apparently all TV was good for was getting your techniques half-right and half-very-wrong.

Viper Obediently, she ditched the pigeon toes and stuck out her tongue as she focused.

Jack snickered into a hand, as if he of all people needed to muffle the sound. Even if they were acting pretty openly out of place in the middle of a department store, the Denizens didn’t seem to mind, anyway. Gave them a wide berth without comment, at least.

“Hope ya don’t need the rudder for balance, there.” He did nothing to clarify what he was referring to.

Viper “Is this better?”

He circled her again, nodding to himself.

“Still look a little too forward-shifted from here, but depends on what works for you, I guess.”

He gave her back another shove, rough but not overly forceful. Whether she passed the test or just corrected herself, he pulled back again.

“So! How’s your stepping?” Onto the real test.

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack “ ’m I s’posed to believe a fifty’ll getcha any decent lesson outside a’ here?”

“Maybe as a first-time discount. Just to see how hopeless ya are.”

“…Mmmmaybe? ’Cause you like me so much?” Viper tilts her head to the side a little, “…But you gotta prove ya’self a good teacher, first. I can always go swap some’a my junk in for cash.”

Admittedly, though, TV was pretty much good for getting your techniques half right and half wrong. Viper can at least acknowledge this and improve. Character growth we stan! Just a shame she can’t have character growth in like, any other section of her life right now.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Hope ya don’t need the rudder for balance, there.”

Viper’s tongue immediately flicks back into her mouth like a lizard at that one.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Still look a little too forward-shifted from here, but depends on what works for you, I guess.”

“Yeah, feels more comfortable for m-!” Cut off by the shove to her back, she clearly has to put less effort into not falling over, but she does lean just a little and quickly corrects. “…Much better!” It wasn’t perfect, she had been leaning too far forward, but it was hell of a lot better.

“I mean, far as I know my steppin’s alright?” Viper crept forward in the same position, and her movements were surprisingly deft and light. She was near-silent, but her technique was a little… clunky.

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper “…Mmmmaybe? ’Cause you like me so much?”

Snort.

“See, more reasons t’not bother likin’ anybody. People just wanna fleece you…”

“Don’t start thinking you’re gonna be the exception.”

Viper I can always go swap some’a my junk in for cash.”

…Could they do that? The siren call of cash… But almost all his stuff was necessary, or he wouldn’t have been lugging it around everywhere. Maybe they’d take some whittlings? But those hadn’t exactly been included with his “necessary medical supplies.” Maybe once he passed the challenge it’d work out. No telling.

Viper Viper’s tongue immediately flicks back into her mouth like a lizard at that one.

Snort, again.

Viper “…Much better!”

“Sure. Not like you set a high bar.”

He watched her step with narrowed eyes. Not a whole lot they could do about their footwear in the situation, so maybe he’d be a little forgiving. Maybe.

“Gonna tire yourself out real fast ‘f ya never shift your weight back—leave more impression on anythin’ soft, too, if you’re worried ’bout that.” Not that it mattered on tile and cheap mall carpet, but she wasn’t just aiming to sneak around this single store, right? “Start with toes, yes, but try an’ roll back after, carefully. Gonna ’specially want your whole foot down when you shift your weight back to take the next step.”

He slipped a few steps forward himself.

“Really are terrible shoes for this, huh.” Ah, well. Might as well train with the leg weights on, yeah?

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack “See, more reasons t’not bother likin’ anybody. People just wanna fleece you…”

“Heyyy, I’m more honest than that.” Says the woman who has done very little but lie a solid 85% of the time. It’s okay, Jack, Viper will find out one way or another whether she can trade her belongings for cash. Luckily, nothing at all ever will stop her from doing so! Nuh uh!

Roadie 🪶Jack “Sure. Not like you set a high bar.”

Viper gives him an offended look in response to this.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Gonna tire yourself out real fast ‘f ya never shift your weight back—leave more impression on anythin’ soft, too, if you’re worried ’bout that.” Not that it mattered on tile and cheap mall carpet, but she wasn’t just aiming to sneak around this single store, right? “Start with toes, yes, but try an’ roll back after, carefully. Gonna ’specially want your whole foot down when you shift your weight back to take the next step.”

Listening intently, she took in the info with ease. Keep your steps light, but shift your weight backwards to avoid leaving impressions… she could do that. Toes, then roll back… It all sounded so simple when he said it like that!

Viper followed his lead as he crept forward a couple of steps, before copying his movements, adjusted to her own weight balancing. It was less refined, but certainly the technique was there. He… was correct about the shoes though.

“…We could always raid some temp ones from the store? What better way to practice, eh?”

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper “Heyyy, I’m more honest than that.”

“Ya did admit you’d fleece me,” Jack conceded. “…But you’d still fleece me.”

Viper Viper gives him an offended look in response to this.

That got a low cackle. Okay, fine, maybe he could see why you’d say crap like this when instructing someone. But at least it was all in good fun here. If it ever wasn’t…?

He’s not thinking about this now.

Viper Viper followed his lead as he crept forward a couple of steps, before copying his movements, adjusted to her own weight balancing. It was less refined, but certainly the technique was there.

He watched carefully. Little hard to be sure of the details from this vantage point, but it seemed passable. And he could judge by the almost-lack of sound, too.

“Better. Don’t gotta shift your whole weight around s’ much, but. Probably get it down ’f ya just keep practicing, at this point.”

“Far as the absolute basics go, at least.”

Viper “…We could always raid some temp ones from the store? What better way to practice, eh?”

“Got a point! Best option’s always gonna be barefoot, but won’t be too sneaky if you’re howling from steppin’ on a jello or somethin’.” Was. Was he trying to say Lego.

“Course, puttin’ things into practice, you’re gonna need a lot more than a light tread.”

“ ’Specially when you can’t ’xactly blend in with the crowd.” Not a lot of cars gave you the chance, really.

“But sure, we can see how good you are at pickin’ spots. Lead the way.”

Not like they’d get in trouble if someone noticed, after all. Just two mall cops examining display shoes very furtively, for mall cop reasons.

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack “Ya did admit you’d fleece me,” Jack conceded. “…But you’d still fleece me.”

“Perhaps if ya deserved it.” Viper hummed, with a coy curl at the corner of her lips.

Roadie 🪶Jack “Better. Don’t gotta shift your whole weight around s’ much, but. Probably get it down ’f ya just keep practicing, at this point.”

“…Yeah, must say it’s kinda weird at first… But…sure I’ll get used ta it. It’ll get easier with time, I’m sure.” She already knew she’d be practicing her sneaking skills any second she got, as she was determined to come as close as possible to becoming on par with Jack, if not better. As unlikely as the latter was

Roadie 🪶Jack “Got a point! Best option’s always gonna be barefoot, but won’t be too sneaky if you’re howling from steppin’ on a jello or somethin’.”

“Uh huh. I’m sure barefoot will come, like, later down the line!” Viper reassures, and continues listening to him. A light tread… yeah, true, she’d need a lot more than that, but hey, it was a start! She was determined. Her motivations were odd for sure, she’d be willing to work at this, but her actual real-life work was so… hit or miss whether she would actually bother to do it or not.

“…Welllll… alrighty!” She heads off, looking quickly for a spot. Cracs had shoes, but just the one type… and she already had some Cracs… “…Hmmm… Mayyyybe Tot Hopic. They won’t be the best, but, like, they prob have ripoffs of those converses. And, besides, it’s like totes easier to steal from somewhere like that ’cause it’s much more crowded.” Viper grins at Jack, like a puppy waiting for praise.

“Wanna give it a shot?”

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper “Perhaps if ya deserved it.” Viper hummed, with a coy curl at the corner of her lips.

Jack barked a laugh. Ahaha, don’t make this about what he deserved, or it’d get nasty real quick. Not quite the same in context, but still not a fun general idea for him.

Viper “…Yeah, must say it’s kinda weird at first… But…sure I’ll get used ta it. It’ll get easier with time, I’m sure.”

“Comes even faster if your life depends on it!”

“I can threaten yours for the full accelerated package, but it’ll cost ya another hundred.”

Viper she was determined to come as close as possible to becoming on par with Jack, if not better. As unlikely as the latter was

Hey, she had a lot fewer chronic injury issues, probably! There was a chance!

He nodded along to her reasoning as if he had any idea what she was talking about. He could read the Tot Hopic sign, at least.

Viper And, besides, it’s like totes easier to steal from somewhere like that ’cause it’s much more crowded.” Viper grins at Jack, like a puppy waiting for praise.

“Looks like more stuff t’ brush up against, too. We’ll see what wins out.” Well, not praise, but it wasn’t scathing criticism!

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack “Comes even faster if your life depends on it!”

Roadie 🪶Jack “I can threaten yours for the full accelerated package, but it’ll cost ya another hundred.”

Viper snorts.

“…Had enough’a that for my time. I’ll consider it, though.” The cheeky grin she gives him says she will be considering it, given that she’s actually able to get some money. Perhaps she should cosplay a burglar and rob a store for its money… that would be a fun use of her time, wouldn’t it?

Roadie 🪶Jack Hey, she had a lot fewer chronic injury issues, probably! There was a chance!

At this point, how long for! She’s determined to be competing with him on that, with her track record!

Roadie 🪶Jack “Looks like more stuff t’ brush up against, too. We’ll see what wins out.”

Viper shrugs, she’s got this! Slipping into the Tot Hopic once she could officially dismount her segway, she makes a beeline for the shoe section. She’s actually being cautious about her footsteps, taking the chance to practice as she navigates through the maze of aisles, in the search for a pair of Converses. Her head occasionally ducks out of view as she squeezes through.

Once she spots her target, she focuses more on instead surveying the shoes. No harm in looking, of course. She turns to Jack, holding up a pair of Converse shoes. “…Reckon these are better’n the ones we’ve got right now?” She actually made a conscious effort to keep her voice quiet. Look at her go!

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper “…Had enough’a that for my time. I’ll consider it, though.”

Jack snorted.

“Sure you wanna give me more time t’ get creative with it?” This would have been a good moment for a knife flip, if he had one!

As it was, he just followed her at a healthy distance hoping he’d be more oriented on this thing by the time she could afford to turn around and check on him. Not necessarily successful, but at least he made across. Getting off this thing now, thank you very much.

He glanced around the store they entered, but nothing in particular caught his eye. Maybe if he was hip with the kids or knew who any of these (bootleg) cartoon people were, but even then. He was firmly emo casual, thanks. He could leave the advanced stuff to, like, uh… that short person he needed to get his dagger back from. They wore tights and crap, right?

But Viper had most of his attention in the moment. Hmhm. Not terrible? At least she hadn’t slipped on anything.

Viper She turns to Jack, holding up a pair of Converse shoes. “…Reckon these are better’n the ones we’ve got right now?”

“Heh. Anything’s gotta be better ’n these.” He didn’t have to expend much of any effort to talk quietly, himself. If he wanted to be loud, well. Hopefully he wouldn’t have any reason to anytime soon. “Sneakers aren’t gonna be bad as a matter a’ course, yeah, long as they fit right and ya don’t trip on the laces.”

He inclined his head toward the checkout counter for a moment but only spared it a glance before watching Viper again.

“Watch your head, too. Good an’ well to keep everythin’ outta sight if you got the opportunity, but ducking from cover to cover’s a bad plan if ya don’t hit it just right. Only if you’re sure everybody’s too distracted in that ’xact moment. Otherwise, sudden motion’s gonna draw the eye way before steady motion does, even if you’re not s’posed to be there at all.”

Viper

Roadie 🪶Jack “Sure you wanna give me more time t’ get creative with it?”

“Absolutely.” Viper shoots a wink in his direction, “All the more fun when it’s more creative, eh?”

Luckily for Jack, Viper doesn’t look back. Only looking forward, we stan a progressive queen. She does, however, take note that he sounds a little further behind than she would expect for someone remotely competent on a Segway. The thought amuses her, but she doesn’t actively push to tease him about it. That’ll be a fact she pockets for later teasing value, thank you!

Roadie 🪶Jack “Heh. Anything’s gotta be better ’n these.”

“Eh, good point.” Viper spends a couple of moments rummaging to find her size, taking them from the very back of the shelf. Less likely to noticed as missing, as well. She spends a moment to crouch down and swap her shoes, using her band-new backpack as cover. She was just trying them on, nothing to worry about, ball citizens! “Oh, these are a lot more comfy…” She nods, before looking back to Jack.

“…'Kay. Watch the head.” She reaches up and actually loosens her ponytail enough that it sits on the back of her head, not on the top. Less likely to be noticeable there! “See, always assume ‘cause of TV an’ stuff, that like… movin’ around real quick is a great plan. Glad I got ya to teach me differently!” She gives Jack an almost affectionate nudge with her elbow.

She care him 💓

“If ya wanna grab ya’self a pair, we’ll get goin’. ” Viper tucked her uniform shoes into her bag within the cover of one of the aisles of bootleg cartoon-people clothing. “Best not ta stick around for too long, eh?” She stretched out her feet by standing on her tip-toes a few times, getting them used to the change of footwear. They felt… a lot better, luckily.

Roadie 🪶Jack

Viper “Absolutely.” Viper shoots a wink in his direction, “All the more fun when it’s more creative, eh?”

“Fun for me, sure. But ’f you’re that much’a a masochist, ya might need psychiatric help.”

Jack watched her larceny process, nodding along slowly. Good individual moves, even if she clearly lacked the life experience to really finesse it. Or something.

Viper “…'Kay. Watch the head.” She reaches up and actually loosens her ponytail enough that it sits on the back of her head, not on the top. Less likely to be noticeable there!

If Jack offered more expressions than “blank,” “sarcastic,” and “traumatized,” he may have looked briefly impressed.

“Yeah, best t’ keep that outta the way much as possible. Loose hair, loose clothes—all just more to brush up against stuff an’ make noise.”

“Y’ever think a’ loppin’ it off?” Shorthair Viper arc.

Viper “See, always assume ‘cause of TV an’ stuff, that like… movin’ around real quick is a great plan. Glad I got ya to teach me differently!”

While the first bit got a semi-derisive snort, he flashed a grin back.

“Careful, my rate’s gonna go up if ya start takin’ me for granted.” Up from the low, low price of gaslighting.

Viper She gives Jack an almost affectionate nudge with her elbow.

His gaze sharpened, but she clearly wasn’t putting her weight behind that. She could at least fight better than this, right? He… probably remembered as much. Some people hit each other for basic communication purposes, he knew that much. That was fine. Just don’t catch him any more off-guard with that stuff or it’ll be your turn for a nose-breaking.

As to what she was trying to communicate, well. He could gloss over it like half of anything else she said. Much easier than trying to relearn what physical affection was.

Viper “If ya wanna grab ya’self a pair, we’ll get goin’. ”

He scanned the display sneakers briefly but didn’t make a move.

“Eh, think I prefer the extra challenge.” Discomfort. “Makes sure I stay sharp, yeah?”

He did glance over a hoodie farther down, but there were a few bright stripes on it that wouldn’t fly. Probably not the most durable weave, either.

Viper “Best not ta stick around for too long, eh?”

“Depends on your approach more ‘n anything, but good rule a’ thumb, yeah. Applies here.”

But did that make it Segway time again? Ugh.