Ouvrons le bal | Vinzent + Abel | Masquerade Car

Vinzent Mayer

[ED mention cw]

Vinzent was staying away from the buffet for more than one reason. But right now as it stands, he was looking a little silly all alone in the ballroom. But… There was one reason that he really doesn’t stick around the buffet area. It’s that he doesn’t get tempted to do exactly what he feared he could do.

Other than… His own issues with food (did the previous car seriously starve them only to present them with so much food? Vinzent didn’t want to think too much on this for now.), Vinzent knew how to keep himself mostly reserved. Yes, even as much as he normally wouldn’t go to an event like this, politeness has been something that was ingrained in him… When his emotions aren’t haywire at least.

His internal turmoil has been set aside for a bit once he heard who it was. Managing to muster up a smile at Abel’s presence, and not minding having his collar fixed by Abel, his question however got Vinzent to take a little longer to answer.

Abel Lazarus “How are you doing?”

“I… I’m not doing great, honestly. I… Um… I don’t know if I told you everything, but…”

He rests his hand on Abel’s, squeezing it lightly, as if to find any sort of stability. To… Not lose it so soon.

“The… I wonder why… We were forced to starve last car, only to… Have a whole f- A whole buffet in front of us. Tempting me to… Do.. Do you know what I mean…?”

While again, he knew Abel wouldn’t mind Vinzent’s swears from time to time, this car made Vinzent hyper aware of… The rules that maybe he’s… Trying to not break it both for his own sake and everyone else’s.

“I’m afraid. That… I’ll do something extremely stupid and… Break the rules at the same time. I’m afraid of… Making everything worse for everyone. I’m afraid of… Losing control of myself…”

Scream, he wants to scream so bad. To just destroy something, anything. Whatever it took, but… With every fucking restriction known in this car…

Perhaps it was a better thing that he just let it all out, even in his softest tone, that Abel knows how much help Vinzent desesperatly needs. And someone to listen to him without any strings attached.

Abel Lazarus

Vinzent Mayer “The… I wonder why… We were forced to starve last car, only to… Have a whole f- A whole buffet in front of us. Tempting me to… Do.. Do you know what I mean…?”

Abel… Didn’t think the car placement was intentional. Or- at least he didn’t… Think too much about it? Certainly he wasn’t pleased with the food situation last car- aside from, of course, the job it offered him- but outside of that…

He really… Could stand to think in detail about it. Their flour selves followed by the library? This probably was intentional- but still.

He doesn’t suspect anything would be wrong with the food. It seems… Against the point? Hard to control who you poison short of going after one persons plate in particular. Poisoning the food itself would be too hard to control.

But they are in a death game…

But he still… Doesn’t suspect the food? When would they have Gotten poison? Public murder is Definitely a faux pas- but perhaps a longer acting one? Something that would take time? People have killed at Lazarus events- after all one of the Dirges Did attempt to murder two of their family members that one time- but he did fall off the cliff instead and they did have the good sense to do it away from the crowd. (Not to mention the Dirges Generally being a strange Death Obsessed Bunch… They should be considered an outlier and not the… Expectation.)

“… Are you worried it’s tampered with…?”

Vinzent Mayer “I’m afraid. That… I’ll do something extremely stupid and… Break the rules at the same time. I’m afraid of… Making everything worse for everyone. I’m afraid of… Losing control of myself…”

He glances around- checking what’s around them. “It’s going to be okay. I can… Explain things to you if you need? Is there anything in particular you’re worried about doing? I think… Talking to safe people. Letting yourself blend in will help. Often- watching the denizens is a good… gauge on what’s appropriate.” He fixed his own sleeve carefully.

He himself… Is only so able to keep a hold on himself because he’s making a task out of what he’s doing. If he’s working he can control himself. If he’s working he can offer people help!

Unfortunately he’s not… The most emotionally intelligent during it, though. He’s just focused on something hard enough that losing his cool isn’t… An option.

Vinzent Mayer

[ED mention]

Abel Lazarus “… Are you worried it’s tampered with…?”

“That’s not the main concern I have, but…”

Abel can understand if Vinzent just tells it like it is. Again, he never liked to admit upsetting things about himself, but… Abel is right there, and Vinzent needs him.

Vinzent then tells Abel that he does have an eating disorder and it’s been a while that he had it. He also says that he’s afraid that falling in his old habits is going to ruin his own progress in getting better. He thinks that the train is specifically trying to mess with him right now.

He clings to Abel, mostly to not lose it. To just… Calm down himself. To try to find reason again.

Abel Lazarus He glances around- checking what’s around them. “It’s going to be okay. I can… Explain things to you if you need? Is there anything in particular you’re worried about doing? I think… Talking to safe people. Letting yourself blend in will help. Often- watching the denizens is a good… gauge on what’s appropriate.” He fixed his own sleeve carefully.

“I… As I said… I’m just afraid of screwing things over. And causing an unnecessary scene or more. I don’t need this, you don’t need this, nobody does. You’re… You’re safe to me. You’re one of the few I feel safe, talking to… And just help me restrain myself over making stupid choices… Please.”

He doesn’t want to let go, he’s still… If he was left alone, who knew what he could be able to do. And what consequences it could entail. So if… He talks about it… It’ll help…? Right? He sincerely hopes so.

Abel Lazarus

CW: more ED convos

Vinzent Mayer “I’m still dealing with anorexia.

Abel… Doesn’t know much about this. He doesn’t know much about anything to do with mental stuff that wasn’t… Spoken about by his father- but this doesn’t sound like something from his dad’s list of diagnosis. Or… something from Cain’s list. Vaguely he’s aware what it is but. Details…

Vinzent Mayer I wish… There was just a way to eat normally for a while, but… Clearly, this train think it is perfectly… Fine to just… Test me.”

He… Isn’t. Sure how to help. This feels like something he’s bound to screw up- because while he doesn’t have the healthiest relationship with food it’s… Mostly tied to not realizing he’s hungry and… Forgetting to eat. Not really… Anything like that. He’s…

He’s not really going to be able to help. Other than offering support.

Vinzent Mayer You’re… You’re safe to me. You’re one of the few I feel safe, talking to… And just help me restrain myself over making stupid choices… Please.”

He nods. Offering that he can do his best- but he worries he… Won’t do very well At It. All he can do is promise to Try.

Vinzent Mayer

CW: ED mention

Abel Lazarus Abel… Doesn’t know much about this. He doesn’t know much about anything to do with mental stuff that wasn’t… Spoken about by his father- but this doesn’t sound like something from his dad’s list of diagnosis. Or… something from Cain’s list. Vaguely he’s aware what it is but. Details…

Vinzent doesn’t go in much details about how he got the disorder, but he mentions that it has started in highschool, among the bullying. It has taken quite a lot of his own efforts and combined therapy to try to overcome it.

Abel Lazarus He… Isn’t. Sure how to help. This feels like something he’s bound to screw up- because while he doesn’t have the healthiest relationship with food it’s… Mostly tied to not realizing he’s hungry and… Forgetting to eat. Not really… Anything like that. He’s…

He’s not really going to be able to help. Other than offering support.

Vinzent… Actually Appreciates the support itself. He apologies for bringing it up in the first place, but appreciates that he’s been listened to. He’ll… Try to be better once more.

Eventually, Vinzent figured it was best to move on, to not… Stick in the same topic for too long, or it’ll make him even more upset. So… After sincerely thanking Abel for at least listening and being there, Vinzent says there’s something else in his mind, but nothing upsetting, just…

“… We’re in a ballroom, right…? I’m not sure… If I know how to dance. Um…”

He holds out a hand for Abel to take, if he wishes.

“If it’s not too much, would it be alright if you… Show me how? I know the dance, the waltz I think, exist in Vienna, but I never really bothered to learn because I’m not much of a ballroom attendee or something. But… I’d… Like to learn it here, while we have the chance…? Or any other ballroom dance I might not know about…! You can surprise me on that one, if you want.”

Abel Lazarus

Vinzent Mayer “… We’re in a ballroom, right…? I’m not sure… If I know how to dance. Um…”

Abel starts off fine enough with the idea of dancing. He knows how- even if it’s definitely been a while (and his last dance was probably rather unpleasant.)

It’s once he takes Vinzent’s hand he seems to remember something… rather important. His shoulder’s range of motion isn’t… very conducive to Dancing Easily. He pauses for a moment. Unsure- but figuring it’s better to just… keep the show going.

Vinzent Mayer But… I’d… Like to learn it here, while we have the chance…? Or any other ballroom dance I might not know about…! You can surprise me on that one, if you want.”

“I won’t say I’m some expert but I can usually… at least shuffle my way through the most basic ones.” He’s underselling himself a little bit because truthfully these never Would be the fun part of these gatherings.

… what is the fun part again?

No matter. He’s also… not the steadiest on his feet which definitely draws away from his ability to enjoy them and be Confident in them. At the very least he likely is required to dance at least a little. The rules are rather… strict. Once you reject someone you’re done for the night sort of thing- and… well.

No matter. Doesn’t matter. He’s fine he’ll power through. They’ll need to stay in the middle where dancing is slower but Abel can manage this- for a little at least.

“Do you know how we position ourselves? Or would you like for me to explain?”

Vinzent Mayer

Vinzent was once again patient, as he wanted to make sure Abel was really okay with the idea.

Abel Lazarus “I won’t say I’m some expert but I can usually… at least shuffle my way through the most basic ones.” He’s underselling himself a little bit because truthfully these never Would be the fun part of these gatherings.

“I’ve never really danced before so even a bit of basic stuff is still more than anything! I’m ready whenever you are.”

As he tries to follow Abel’s steps, clearly focused, Vinzent heard his voice and nodded at the last part.

Abel Lazarus “Do you know how we position ourselves? Or would you like for me to explain?”

“I’m… I would appreciate the explanation, please…!”

Visual examples were one thing and it helps, but perhaps a more detailed step-by-step would get him a little more familiar with that dance. All in all, Vinzent was determined to learn some things outside of his usual zone. And… He found the idea of ballroom dancing fun right now.

Abel Lazarus

Vinzent Mayer “I’m… I would appreciate the explanation, please…!”

Abel first takes his expected position- and he’s clearly Enough in discomfort moving his arm that much. He pushes through, though, as it’s not… Terrible. Just. Far more aware than he usually is.

“One of your hands will be in mine- your other hand will go on my shoulder. I… Recommend placing it below my shoulder, though.” Mostly because he’d Really appreciate NOT having a hand directly over his wound. “After this it’s mostly… Step work. Follow what I do closely.”

Maybe after this… He will… Not dance again. Perhaps. He can do this for a little, but a whole night…

Vinzent Mayer

Vinzent was very careful in his hand placement, as he does as Abel instructed him. Hand below the shoulder, then the other in his…

“Like this, it’s good?”

As he follows diligently the steps, Vinzent seemed to have regained his smile, even if it was a little one. It shows that he’s currently enjoying it, even if just for a short while. He definitely doesn’t want to dance all night for sure. But right now? He did need some distraction, and this was perfect. Forget about his current worries, let it be a little.

This… Is nice. Really nice. Just keep it going for a little longer, until most of his worries wash away.

“This is fun..!”

Even in his smaller voice now, Vinzent figured he’d let Abel know how he felt right now.

Abel Lazarus

Vinzent Mayer “Like this, it’s good?”

Abel nods to confirm.

Vinzent Mayer and this was perfect.

Less than perfect surely. Abel has nearly tripped over his own feet once or twice- but he’s doing well enough showing Vinzent what they’re doing. It’s as enjoyable as it can be when he’s a little distracted with teaching or dancing. As well as his shoulder…

Vinzent Mayer “This is fun..!”

He doesn’t think dancing is Fun- exactly- but he finds this enjoyable enough despite that fact. He’s glad Vinzent’s at least enjoying himself too.

Better to not think about the situation at hand. Dancing can offer than at least.

The dancing does slow some, though. He nearly stumbles again and he’s not enjoying having his arm up. He can’t do this much longer.

Vinzent Mayer

Abel Lazarus Less than perfect surely. Abel has nearly tripped over his own feet once or twice- but he’s doing well enough showing Vinzent what they’re doing. It’s as enjoyable as it can be when he’s a little distracted with teaching or dancing. As well as his shoulder…

Perhaps not the perfection Abel was seeking, but it was still something helpful to Vinzent to distract himself as he focused on what he was trying to follow along at least.

As Vinzent noticed the slowing down…

Abel Lazarus The dancing does slow some, though. He nearly stumbles again and he’s not enjoying having his arm up. He can’t do this much longer.

He slows down as well, letting go of Abel’s arm so it can be lowered.

“Are you okay…? It’s quite alright if you want to stop now, but um… It was fun while it lasted, yeah..?”

If there’s anything, at least he seemed to be in better spirits now than earlier. It did offer him a good outlet to let it go without messing up in everything else.

… Oh! He remembered seeing it in some movies, so maybe it’ll be a little silly, but… Vinzent bows down like a gentleman as he smiles to Abel.

“Thank you for the dance, Abel.”

Abel Lazarus

Vinzent Mayer letting go of Abel’s arm so it can be lowered.

The relief is clear on his face as his arm is down. He reaches up and rubs just below it on his shoulder to try and alleviate the remaining Ache.

“Arm.” He clears his throat softly. “Just can’t hold it up too long, I think.” He gives a smile to reassure him about it. “I think it needs to rest.”

Vinzent Mayer Vinzent bows down like a gentleman as he smiles to Abel.

The bow is a little amusing- mostly because it’s technically his job to do as the one who lead the dance. He matches it- being able to bow a lot easier than dance.

Vinzent Mayer “Thank you for the dance, Abel.”

“Of course.” He nods. “I’m not sure if the… denizens will ask us to dance but if they do keep in mind you… kind of have to say yes. Or not dance again.” The tip comes without thinking. Perhaps Melvin and Viper’s conversations first prepared him to just parrot these rules. “Remember to just carefully watch your dance partner.”

Vinzent Mayer

Abel Lazarus “Arm.” He clears his throat softly. “Just can’t hold it up too long, I think.” He gives a smile to reassure him about it. “I think it needs to rest.”

“Oh, right… That’s completely understandable, then.” Vinzent smiles in turn.

Abel Lazarus The bow is a little amusing- mostly because it’s technically his job to do as the one who lead the dance. He matches it- being able to bow a lot easier than dance.

It was nice to see it in return, as he still smiles.

Abel Lazarus “Of course.” He nods. “I’m not sure if the… denizens will ask us to dance but if they do keep in mind you… kind of have to say yes. Or not dance again.” The tip comes without thinking. Perhaps Melvin and Viper’s conversations first prepared him to just parrot these rules. “Remember to just carefully watch your dance partner.”

“Oh, alright…! Thank you for the tips, I’ll keep them in mind.”

Vinzent nods at the final tip.

“It’s all noted. Um…”

He clears his throat.

“I… I’m not sure what else to say, we could sit together and chat but, I know you probably have more things to do, so… I’ll be okay for now.”

He does look at Abel, smiling again. Vinzent needs to hold it together, and he thinks he can manage for the moment, it’s at least better than earlier.

“But.. I’d like to talk to you soon, like next time you want to. Thanks a lot for everything.”

Abel Lazarus

Vinzent Mayer “But.. I’d like to talk to you soon, like next time you want to. Thanks a lot for everything.”

Abel nods. “I think a little later we probably can. I’m. Going to check on some people- make sure no one’s… messing up too badly.” It’s a job. An honest little living.

A way to control himself or whatever.

“If I just… ‘go freshen up’ I can probably make sure Melvin at least made it this far.” He doesn’t find Melvin that helpless but he Certainly worries about it Anyway. He’s far more worried about the optics of a fight breaking out.

“You should talk to people. Haruka, perhaps? Company isn’t a bad thing.” And helps you blend in more- something he Does want Vinzent to do. “I’ll be back soon enough.”

Vinzent Mayer

Abel Lazarus Abel nods. “I think a little later we probably can. I’m. Going to check on some people- make sure no one’s… messing up too badly.” It’s a job. An honest little living.

“Alright!” He believes it!

Abel Lazarus “If I just… ‘go freshen up’ I can probably make sure Melvin at least made it this far.” He doesn’t find Melvin that helpless but he Certainly worries about it Anyway. He’s far more worried about the optics of a fight breaking out.

Hopefully!

“Yeah, I hope so too.”

Abel Lazarus “You should talk to people. Haruka, perhaps? Company isn’t a bad thing.” And helps you blend in more- something he Does want Vinzent to do. “I’ll be back soon enough.”

“You’re right… Thank you, that reminds me, I’d like to chat with her..! See you, then!”

After politely waving Abel goodbye, Vinzent went to look for Haruka. Or at least, for anyone he still gets along with well.